One of the virtual communities that I recently became a part of is Facebook. I actually became a member over a year ago because of the pressure from friends and family, but I didn't become an active participant until a few months ago.
When I first started Facebook I was constantly on it. About a week into it, I started to get a little nervous thinking that I may have a huge problem on my hands. It was taking time away from pretty much everything in my life. The things that suffered while I put Facebook as my priority were my time with my kids and husband, the house cleaning, my homework, and working out. I noticed some weight gain, lots of clutter, and the kids taking advantage of my one track mind. As I became more involved in Facebook my kids played more video games than you could imagine.
However, despite all the negative things that were going on because of my new found community my relationships on Facebook were flourishing. I was interacting with friends I hadn't seen or talked to since high school. I have many friends and family that live in another state and I am able to communicate on a daily basis if I want to with them. I love being able to show off pictures to all my family and friends, especially the friends that normally I wouldn't send pictures to.
I feel the way I interact with my friends and family on Facebook is very similar to how I would act in person. I may hold back on talking about boring or negative issues, although some of my friends feel the need to tell us every boring detail of their life. I feel I have renewed old friendships and I enjoy this new addition to my life. I try to work on balancing and prioritizing my day so that Facebook doesn't consume it. I usually log on for a few minutes each day now, and sometimes I've even miss a day. But that's OK, it doesn't seem to bother anyone.
The biggest barrier with my Facebook community is the barrier of religion. Many of my friends and family are a specific religion, and believe me you can't miss it. They will talk about this religion as if everything revolves around it, which it does! I am no longer part of that religion and I know that if I said what I wanted to say about it, that I may lose some friends. So I refrain, along with some others who think the same way I do from speaking up. I try to look past this issue because I enjoy conversing with old friends. But this does limit the relationship I have with many of them. I have found other communities that think the same way I do about religion and I get to say what I think there. This seems to work for me, although I know that some people say what they think regardless of other peoples feelings and this causes people to drop out of the community or drop that person off of their friends list. Sad but true.....
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I had to smile as you talked about Facebook consuming you and "taking over your life" for a bit. I have three kids, so I can certainly relate to them trying to take advantage of your one track frame of mind. Kids seem to know when to strike, don't they!! :-)
ReplyDeleteYour post seemed very honest and straightforward. The way that you shared how Facebook consumed you was a great insight into how many others online fall into the same pitfall.
It's been said that guys have a one track mind, but apparently some women on Facebook have taken on a one track mindset as well. LOL....It's so easy to be engulfed in a virtual world and "forget" that you have real things going on around you.
I know that I have caught myself doing the same thing at times. You sit down, start chatting and posting, surfing, etc... and BAM!!! Three hours just dissapeared!! Then it hits you....The kids asked to eat a package of Oreo's and you said, Sure, go for it." without hesitation.
That was so funny because it is so true. I get so cought up on a program or a problem with home work or work that my kids will run wild until thier dad gets home. Or before I know it it is 5am before I go to bed and every one is just starting to get up for the day. I think I missed sleep again. Glad to know I am not alone on that one. 5 hours of real time seems like 2 min on virtual time.
ReplyDeleteI have to agree with our fellow classmates. My first runs with FB had me obsessed! I can't say it distracted too much but enough for me to say to myself, "geez...haven't you got better things to do? people to see?" I've kinda purposely stayed away from "virtual communities" partly because I don't have the time and partly bc I'd rather be interacting with people face to face than to pretend to be someone else or spend my time staring at a computer screen. (okay, maybe not pretending to be someone else, but you know what I mean.)
ReplyDeleteanyway, good post!
Your FB profile and space as you described it at one point -- interacting with people you don't see or hadn't seen -- could have been a virtual community, but as more and more people that you see in physical space came into play, did it not move from nascent virtual community to reenactment of physical community? What is the distinction.
ReplyDeleteAlthough I do continue to add more people to my FB space that are also a part of my physical community, I think there is still a very clear distinction about the two communities. My FB is still to me a virtual community, I don't feel that it is a reenactment of my physical community. Many of the people who are a part of my physical community tend to use the virtual community as a main source of communication. For example I will run into a friend in the store, and instead of chatting there, we agree to talk about our vacation or just life in general through FB. It seems like I end a lot of conversations with make sure you post some pictures.
ReplyDeleteI don't have as many friends from my current hometown as I do from my hometown out of state. So, maybe one day if I end up with more friends from my physical community it may start to look like a reenactment of my physical community. But as for now I don't think that has happened for me.